Relational CORE Fitness - Blog
15 February, 2025
Relational CORE Fitness - Blog

Relational CORE Fitness – Why it is important

By Birgit Trauer

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Relational CORE Fitness is vital for our sense of happiness and well-being.

Our sense of well-being is challenged immensely in a world of growing disconnect, unhappiness, and loneliness. The now-recognised loneliness epidemic, the emotional recession and the decline in empathy, as noted in the State of the Heart 2024 research report, are of growing concern.

My life experiences and research over the years have taught me that for our overall wellbeing, we need to not only take care of our physical fitness, the common focus in discussions around quality of life and longevity, but our relational fitness.

The rising relational disharmony, disconnect, and social isolation tell us that we have to invest in building our psychological skills. We must develop and practice relational fitness as part of our active overall wellness lifestyle and our aspirations for holistic wellbeing. 

Relational CORE Fitness provides insight, tools, and skills that elevate our capacity to proactively create, contribute, and maintain healthy and joyful relationships.

The uptake and practice of Relational CORE Fitness, with its foundational courses of relational wisdom, emotional empowerment, and conscious communication, is a process of transformation that promotes individual, relational, and community well-being.  

Relational CORE Fitness is needed in a cultural climate of intensified individualism.

We are living in an era where intense competitiveness, entitlement, and egocentrism have infiltrated our internal and external human landscapes. Finger-pointing, negative labelling, blaming and shaming in public and private spheres appear to be unquestioned norms for many.

Social media has become the means to spread pop psychology that pathologises people, which, accompanied by a trend of victimisation, is disconnecting us in various ways from our shared humanity and the love we seek.

Relationship breakdown, divorce, family estrangement, isolation, discrimination, polarisation, and associated deterioration of mental health are evident globally. Overt accusations and aggression are on the rise, while conflict avoidance appears to have become the accepted norm.

In this cultural climate of diminishing empathy in general, and compassionate empathy in particular, our psychological and physical health and well-being are on the decline. We are experiencing and witnessing growing relational dysfunction.

As a panacea for wellness and well-being, self-care activities are now promoted.

Searching the internet, we can find offers to immerse ourselves in another world with experiences that foster relaxation, greater self-awareness, resilience, self-esteem, and self-love.

Alongside this development, the idea of mindfulness, mostly drawing on Eastern religious and spiritual traditions, has taken the world by storm, including the global world of wellness. Unfortunately, with its commercialisation, the core teachings of self-transcendence are often forgotten or ignored.  

It is worthwhile to pause and consider the question: How is mindfulness integrated into our daily lives and the love for others and the world around us? True self-awareness, resilience, and healthy self-esteem do not grow in isolation from the realities of relational challenges and conflicts in our daily lives. 

Considering our mindless daily existence and the sense of loneliness that permeates our lives at home, at work, and in the world at large, we benefit from the Western scientific tradition along the Eastern perspective, asking ourselves:

What are we mindful of? What do we care about?

While being willing and able to care for ourselves remains important, our lives in captivity due to the restrictions during the COVID-19 epidemic brought to our attention the importance of interdependence and mutual care.

It became clear that we all have a fundamental human need to feel a connection with others, to feel welcome in a world outside our four walls; to feel cared for and providing care for others.

We all yearn to feel heard, seen, and valued, to give and receive love, and experience the joy of human energies found in caring and nourishing social relationships.

The Harvard Study of Adult Development, a longitudinal study of 80 years, tells us that a decline in social relationships and an increase in stress levels have been identified as causes for the rise in mental health issues and decline in physical health.

The meaningful and supportive connections in our lives have been recognised as being at the core of our happiness and well-being. As renowned Belgian-American psychologist Esther Perel emphasises,

“The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives.”

In a world where overt and covert messages tell us to be self-reliant and self-sufficient, it helps to remember that we are part of many different relationships in the web of life, those with

  • our significant others,
  • our parents and siblings,
  • our grandparents and extended family,
  • our close and casual friends,
  • our mates at sport and work colleagues,
  • our immediate and distant communities,
  • the world around us,
  • and importantly, ourselves.

Often overlooked is the kind of intimate connection we have with ourselves, the level of understanding and appreciation for who we are and who we want to be, both as individuals and as part of relationships with others.

Living in a world where the quality of relationships and our individual and collective well-being are deteriorating, we benefit from redirecting our attention to the dynamics of relationships in all spheres of our lives.

All relationships matter – starting with the relationship we have with ourselves.

This article is entirely composed by Dr. Birgit Trauer without AI input.

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